Waking Up – Monday Motivation #16

Waking Up: Me and My Self Esteem

As I begin to emerge from a haze of illness, I took some moments today to reinvigorate my self-esteem – to remind myself that while breathlessness, coughing, fevers, aches, and frustration have highlighted my past week, they do not redefine the woman that I am.

No,

• I didn’t blog,
• I didn’t work,
• I didn’t clean house at all,
• no laundry was done,
• I didn’t return phone calls,
• I didn’t even bathe or change clothes for a few days in there

… and those things add up to a picture of a woman failing as a mother, a co-worker, as a woman – they add up to a big kick to the gut of my self-esteem.

Those images bring little whispers of self-doubt that I knew I needed to eradicate.

• As I stripped my sheets and made my bed fresh,
• as I picked up all the used tissues and vacuumed my bedroom floor,
• as I made some fresh omelets and French toast for my son and I this morning,

I thought of how to combat the feelings of insufficiency that were creeping in.

I decided to investigate a video that I had seen last week before I fell ill.

Dove™ did a special project looking at how women perceive themselves as compared to how others see us, You can find more information about it on their site: (http://realbeautysketches.dove.us/)

The Beauty We Don’t See

Each one of those women are beautiful and yet they described themselves so differently than we might’ve described them.

We are so often so cruel to ourselves.

We see only those things that we are trying so hard to hide from the world. A bulge here, a scar there, a messy house, an imperfect tooth, a nose our mother always ridiculed, a laugh that others heckle.

We don’t see:

• the light we bring to a room,
• the joy that others glean from knowing us,
• the well-placed hug,
• the word of encouragement,
• the way our hair falls just so,
• the way our eyes light up when we laugh,
• the time others spend thinking of us and looking forward to our company.

We are so willing to overlook all those things  – believing them to be in the shadows of our “real selves” – our negative self – that one I was mentioning before that is full of stuff we have to hide.

Deep Breaths

Pneumonia doesn’t allow many full deep breaths in a physical sense, but watching the Dove video on Youtube was amazing and enlightening.

It allowed me to regain perspective on how things really are.

I took a deep breath today – a spiritual one and I exhaled the negative self-talk of all the things I haven’t done for the past week.

And with that negative energy gone, I inhaled some fresh air – literally.  I opened the windows and let spring into my room and into my spirit.

I forgave myself for being sick – I mean seriously – who the hell thinks that’s a deliberate choice?

And today — I begin again, self-esteem in tow, proceeding with a positive outlook as I step into my future.

What are some ways that you are ready to remind yourself that you don’t measure up?  And what triggers you into beginning that negative self talk?  Or what compliments do you regularly hear about yourself that feel amazing and deserved?  How can / do you turn those into your new self-talk mantras?